I will actually be a sit-down comic

Wright: I can seriously chew on a straw forever

Ron: I can’t stand that shit, but I do chew gum a lot. Not that it bothers me to see people chew on stuff, but I can’t do it personally

Wright: I chew, suck, and otherwise orally amuse myself whenever possible

Ron: When my oral fixation urge fires up, I go down to the gym and blow a few guys and it goes away

Wright: LOL…oh shit

Ron: Hahaha, I’m kidding!

Ron: I don’t go to a gym, I go to a porno theater.

This is all going in my stand-up comedy special. HBO Presents: “Stop Being Such a Fucktard Live on Broadway.”

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7 Responses to “I will actually be a sit-down comic”

  1. Ginger Says:

    Can I still be the “Wacky Radio Morning Show Host”?

  2. Ron Says:

    Only if you can handle working alongside a bipolar clown who is addicted to cocaine.

  3. Jade Says:

    Hey, that’s no way to talk about Len. 😉

  4. Klinde Says:

    I know why I should not be reading this at work…. It’s because I have snorted twice… Once reading this and another reading Ginger’s….

  5. Ron Says:

    Klinde: I try my best to make people spray drinks from their nose, but at the very least I’ll take a loud snort.

    Jade: Ugh, don’t remind me I have to still edit that thing.

  6. Ginger Says:

    Klinde: Ron had me literally crying today at my desk, because I was having to hold in my laughter. (All of this in reference to Mack’s “bag of dicks” comment over at MCB!) I thought I was gonna die of laughter!

    If Ron wishes to elaborate, I recommend that all readers do not drink beverages while reading.

  7. Ron Says:

    Hmm, I have to remember what I said.

    First I snarled because he stole my expression “bag of dicks” and I said that I hoped he’d get deported. Then I said “In Mack’s case it’s not a bag but more like a pocket protector of cocks.” I followed that up with, “I personally have an attaché case of phalluses,” and then Ginger and I debated on whether or not the plural of penis was peni or penii. I also said that a certain thread “had more bullshit in it than Ferdinand” (a reference to a 1938 Disney cartoon about a bull who loved to sniff flowers and be homosexual).

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