my black mistress, my secret love

My coffee revirginity was taken tonight by a nice older woman at the gas station who hooked me up with a 20oz black Colombian blend. I don’t know how long it’s been since I’ve found myself in the hot embrace of my steamy black mistress, but goddamn have I missed her. She always perks me right up, shakes away the fatigue, and of course, scalds my tongue in the best way possible.

I was proud of myself for shaking my favorite, daily addiction, but nothing good lasts forever. Eventually, even the strongest of men succumbs to temptation once again. Like an alcoholic bartender, the daily temptation got the best of me and I gave into my sinister urges. I fought it for, literally, months.

I quit coffee cold turkey just randomly. I literally went from 6 cups to a pot a day, plus a bunch of soda, to just the soda. Then I cut back on the soda, too. I guess I never shook it completely, but the thing I loved most I gave up. I’m telling myself it’s just a temporary fix… a tool while I stay up and write my review of Get Smart for Den of Geek, but will it stay there? I don’t know; work coffee is one thing, but the little coffee and wifi place on the corner with the good coffee? The gas station with its 6 varieties of java and infinite creamers, flavors, and sweeteners (AKA the coffee whorehouse, where all your dreams come true on the cheap no matter what you like) and constant fresh pot availability? That’s another thing.

It’s not that I feel bad about drinking the coffee; I mostly feel weak for having given up on my exile from Java. It’s not as though I quit caffeine (that’s pretty impossible, since I think caffeine is in the drinking water now), but instead of grabbing a sugar free Red Bull or some Vault Free, I walked past the soda display entirely and straight to the good stuff. The smell… mmm, the smell! I missed it. I missed the sensation of the heat on my tongue, the steam in my nose, the warmth of the cup between my hands… I missed the whole coffee experience.

Let’s never fight again, Dark Roast. I’ve missed you so much, 100% Colombian. Come over here and let me get a good taste of you, Premium Blend. Energy coffee, I’ve never had your hypercaffeinated kiss, but I welcome it. It’s been a long three months.


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5 Responses to “my black mistress, my secret love”

  1. squirrelqueen Says:

    I’ve never been bitten by the coffee bug, my jones for caffeine is enormous. I’ve ditched sodas, but unsweet tea and I are best buddies now.

  2. Ron Says:

    Coffee is just easiest to get ahold of. I love tea, but it’s not everywhere like coffee is.

  3. squirrelqueen Says:

    You’re right about the accessibility issue, especially on the unsweet angle. I can find bottles of sweet, lemony sweet, “diet” and even extra sweet, but the unsweet version is pretty rare in the local quick marts.

  4. Jade Says:

    I’m surprised it wasn’t a Dunkin Donuts Coffee Coolatta that did you in–those things are seriously addictive, especially in hot weather.

  5. Ron Says:

    SQ: I can’t find the sugar free version of most energy drinks at the local marts, either. It’s a shame, because I love Vault Free.

    Jade: We don’t actually have any Dunkin Donuts near anywhere I go in the course of my normal day. Plus, you know me, I’m trying not to intake any sugar unless I just can’t resist it. That said, those commercials make them look disturbingly delicious.

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