You guys have no idea how proud I am of my half-brother Seth Rogen today. Last night I went to see his new movie, Pineapple Express, and I really enjoyed it. I consider it a knowing birthday present to me, and it was very nice of him.
Sure he doesn’t call as much as I’d like, or ever, but I know he’s thinking of me from his palacial Hollywood mansion when he’s not busy snorting cocaine off of supermodels and living every fat dude’s dream. Plus he’s growing the beard back, which I obviously approve of.